I always feel out of place sometimes, the thoughts do I belong here ? eats me up like guilt. I mean I love tech but sometimes it all just seems overwhelming and I don't want to rest cause there is so much to learn. Phew! what I learnt yesterday I forgot already, please where is my note? am sure I wrote it down somewhere.

You know I just read an article last week that kid was 13 when he got that internship at Google, am 19 and am not even sure know a thing yet.

Sometimes I google what to build ??? cause I am tired of watching tutorial videos, are you not tired too, you are right? I mean I want to build my start-up from the ground up, I already perfected the product in my head and it made sense (You ever built a start-up in your head ???, trust me it's a great feeling until you open your code editor) now I open my code editor my fingers get numb, my head is blank and then again I google how to build blah blah blah ? and then I found nothing. Really!, so nobody could do a tutorial on how to build this thing? I mean it's not even a new product phew! ( can you imagine the level of entitlement to tech tutors you don't pay, meanwhile my shout-out goes to all tech tutors out there I love you all ) .

Okay let me take a break I would go on Twitter to cool off for a bit and then boom! I saw this " just accepted a position as a software engineer at Netflix " I was happy for that person (even if am not, can I change it?) but the thought when would I tweet this oh lord ??? came banging on my head like headache, this me that still struggles to understand data types?...

The shoes just always seem heavier by the day, it's like am impersonating someone else. All the code I ever wrote has been from watching tutorials, I've never written a single line of code that is by my thought , and right now am officially tired...